This post is for the guy that wrote the “14 tips when having an affair”. I’m not sure if I was more offended that he had the nerve to post about it, rather than by the fact that I have been cheating on my husband for almost two and a half years now and I never thought to tell others have to do it. He beat me to it.
I digress. This isn’t about me.
If you are having an affair and want to make sure your husband doesn’t find out, follow MY simple steps.
– When your husband goes away on business, make sure you tell him about your plans to “have a night out with the girls”- He doesn’t need to know that you might be playing with boys instead.
…you have a best friend that knows your situation. Make sure she knows to cover for you in case your husband ever calls her looking for you…
-Use cash. Stay away from using credit cards when on your adventures. No paper trail right?
-Don’t give out many details to your lover. The less they know about you, the better.
-Ideally you have a best friend that knows your situation. Make sure she knows to cover for you in case your husband ever calls her looking for you. Take her out once a week so you have a built-in excuse to be leaving for a few hours or more.
-Start going to the gym at least twice a week. Not only will it do your body good, but you’ll have an excuse to be leaving the house. Even better, you won’t raise any suspicion when you come home looking like you just worked out.
-Keep private! Going out into public when having an affair is a big no-no! This means no Starbucks, no Home Depot nothing! You are bound to run into someone you know, or someone that knows you or your husband or the cute man you are walking with.
-Do not, under any situation, give your little friend your home number. He gets only your cell phone # and maybe your email.(See below)
-Get yourself a hotmail address. Use that hotmail for any naughty emails the two of you might send back and forth but remember to watch what you type at work! Also use this email to sign up for online dating sites or what ever naughtyness you are doing.
Don’t forget a washcloth and some toil…tries to freshen up afterwards. Might as well be prepared!…
-You never know when you might have an urge for a rendezvous so keep a change of clothes at the gym in a locker, or in your car. Something casual but sexy and make sure it doesn’t look out of place jammed into a gym bag! Don’t forget a washcloth and some toiletries to freshen up afterwards. Might as well be prepared!
-If you work, start working later, even when you having nothing to do at work. Do it at least once a week if you can. This will allow you at least one time a week to be on your adventure.
-If you are in business, start scheduling after-work meetings. Make sure to talk about them to your husband so he is familiar with the idea of you not being home after work.
-Try and walk or take a cab when you go on your adventures. Getting in an accident in a part of the city that isn’t even close to the gym might be hard to explain. Park at the gym and take a cab!
-IF you are seen with your little friend, and it gets back to your husband there are a couple of things that can get your out of it.
—He’s an old friend from “any job you used to have”
—He’s your best friend’s cousin from out of state and you were showing him around.
—He’s a new client
-The last one is the most important. DENY EVERYTHING!